Happy Mother's Day!

I wanted to wish a Happy Mother's Day to our moms and to each of you!

Just as any holiday, today can be a day that is painful for some of you. Some of you are missing your own mother today. Whether you have lost her to death or a broken relationship, you are not celebrating with her.
Some of you are grieving the loss of a child today. Whether it be through an abortion decision, miscarriage, adoption, or death, the void in your life is magnified today. I pray that God grants you peace today and comforts that pain with a love that only He can give.
Some of you are still waiting to meet your child and your arms are aching with emptiness this morning. I pray that the people around you are you are sensitive to your pain and that your emptiness is filled by the comfort of the Father.

There is a piece of my heart that understands and is feeling each of these situations today and for many of the past Mother's Days. It is always a tough day for me.
Last year, my birthday was on Mother's Day. I took a pregnancy test that morning before church. Rusty and I had been "trying" and I just knew that God was going to give me this for my gift. My parents were coming over for dinner and I had bought creative ways to tell them about the pregnancy, grandparents gifts and pink and blue jelly beans for my sisters. It was going to be so perfectly timed (it was my timing though, not His.) The test was obviously negative and I was devastated. I went to church and barely made it through. What is normally a tough service for me was unbearable. The pastor had all of the mother's stand to be recognized and as everyone around us clapped for them, I sat in my chair and sobbed. I felt so empty and betrayed by God. Why couldn't He give me some joy on this day that is so sad for me? Later that afternoon, I cried to Rusty and said, "At least this will be the last year that I ever have to feel this way on Mother's Day. Next year, I will get to celebrate being a mom."
So, here we are: a year later and I am not pregnant. I told Rusty that there is no way that I could survive church this year. Maybe it is selfish, but I know my limits. I told him that I wanted to go to the woods and not see a mother! So, he took me on a trip this weekend. We are at Horseshoe Bay on Lake LBJ. It has been such a great weekend to get away and relax. I don't want to be in denial, but just knew that this was essential for my sanity! I am so blessed to have a husband that understands me and loves me the way that he does. So much of my pain happened before he even knew me, but he has always taken it on as his own. He lets me grieve, grieves with me, and is always there to wipe my tears!

I will post some pictures of this beautiful trip when we get home. But, for now, I just wanted to wish each of you a blessed day. I am praying for each of you. For the ones that are hurting today and the ones that are filled with joy!