Remembrance

Last year for my birthday and mother's day, my parents gave me this beautiful remembrance ring. It is Holland's birthstone, an amethyst. I absolutely love this ring and have worn it every single day since I got it. Not that I need something to remind me of my sweet son, but every time I notice the ring on my finger, it reminds me of him. Sometimes I notice it while grasping the steering wheel as I drive. Sometimes it is when I am washing my hands or holding a book. No matter where I am, I take that minute to say a little prayer for his day, for his family, for his future.


I then decided that I wanted to get two more rings to go with the amethyst, a peridot for August and a tanzanite for December. All of the babies that I have lost would have been born in those two months. I wanted to recognize those babies as well because not a day passes that I don't think of them and grieve for them.


Soon after I got my ring, I had lunch with my friend Erica. We talked about the ring and I encouraged her that she needed to get one to celebrate her new baby, Nate. Then, she shared the idea with me that she would like to get two rings- one to symbolize Nate and a diamond one to symbolize her other babies that she had lost- her angels in Heaven. She asked if I thought that was silly. Silly? No way, I thought that it was beautiful! I absolutely loved the idea.


I have been wanting a diamond one ever since that day. One ring to symbolize all six of the babies that I never got the chance to hold.

Today, the doorbell rang and the UPS man gave me a package. It was a gift from my sweet husband. A beautiful diamond remembrance ring.


Now, every time I look down at my hand, I will not only say a prayer for Holland, but I will also think of my other children. I may not ever have the chance to hold them this side of Heaven, but they will never be forgotten.


And I cling to the hope that someday, I will be able to add another ring to my finger.